Do babies pick you?

Did you ever think, dear Mother, As the seeds of me you sowed, As you breathed new life inside of me And slowly watched me grow, In all your dreams about me When you planned me out so well,When you couldn't wait to have me there Inside your heart to dwell, Did you ever think that maybe, I was planning for you, too, And choosing for my very own A mother just like you? A mother who smelled sweet and who had hands so creamy white, A tender, loving creature Who would soothe me in the night? Did you ever think in all those days While you were coming due, That as you planned a life for me I sought a life with you? And now as I lay in your arms, I wonder if you knew While you were busy making me, I was choosing you!

I remember when I had sev holding his perfect body, smelling his yummy baby smell and thinking I was so scared that I would make a mistake or not care for him as i should I wanted to be the perfect mother for this perfect baby boy my grandmother said " Heavenly father wouldn't have gave you him if he thought you weren't right" It made me think shes right how could I have thought I couldn't do this I started to be strong and not scared then It became natural for me. I can't wait for little baby cries little hands and feet little diapers and yes breast feeding I really enjoyed that I had to stop when sev was 14 month because I was afraid that I could nourish all three of us or I would have done it longer.

This poem makes me think of how sweet this is I really do think that we choose our siblings and our parents each person plays a special role in their family. I joke to sevrin and Ike all the time that this baby was ready and sevrin and it had a plan in heaven that no matter what it was coming down when sevrin is almost two I have always wanted to be a mother and said I wanted a boy first and the first two to be two years apart so they can have a tight bond like my sisters and me. So far all I ever wanted has come true. A perfect husband who I love so much and a beautiful baby boy and a another child on the way. This pregnancy was not planned and to tell you the truth I was a little scared to find out. How could I love two children? Can I person have enough love,time and attention as they had for their first child? I love sev more and more every day It's hard to explain my emotions because they are so strong but the more and more I carry this little one the more and more I think, it can be possible. This pregnancy has been a little rough I've been so sick with "morning" sickness more like all day sickness, food never sounds good and smell drive me crazy. With sev I through up every day and was sick all day but when I came home from work I would just sleep and eat food always sounded good and smells didn't bother me thank goodness that would have been awful working in the hospital. Even though it is hard at first I know it is worth it in the end. We go on Monday to our first doctors appointment I'll let you know how every thing goes.

My little sev is growing up so fast and getting smarter every day I wonder if every one thinks this that there child is the smartest I really think he is so smart he knows all the body parts if you tell him he will point them out. He is a excellent dancer and comes up with new moves all the time. He also has this shape jar that you put shapes in the hole he can do that and turns them the right way. He is a great reader he grabs a book and babels away telling me stories it's so cute. For 15 months old I think that is pretty good. My favorite thing he does when he's mad is he lays in the floor like a murder victim you know the kind where they draw chalk around he wont scream or do any thing just lay there. If this is his temper tantrums I love it i hope it stays like that. He'll look up at you and rolls his eyes its so funny. He's a great little man and he is perfect to me. I couldn't have asked for a better one. I hope were just as lucky with this new one.